CONTENT WARNING: Innuendo-type humour, parental abuse, bereavement
Owen
It seems as though just last week we were still in the depths of winter, and almost from nowhere, the early spring rolls in upon Henford. The biting cold hasn't changed a bit, but it's quite beautiful seeing the trees full and the flowers blooming again.
To be greeted by an early spring is a blessing.
To be greeted by Walter Viridis is a curse.
I keep thinking that I've seen the last of him, and he always comes crawling back. The Viridis bloodline live far out in Glimmerbrook, a peculiar lot. The matriarch, Isidora, is fairly young, yet she is said to have an unfathomable madness about her. She's rarely seen. Her uncle likes to think himself an alchemist, supposedly chasing after some kind of 'green lion' that will give him all the answers to the universe's biggest questions, and turn the more ordinary metals into pure gold.
A little strangeness does no harm, of course. As for his cures, well...
"Oh, but you don't understand, Dr. Annorin, sir! I have perfected this formula- I know for certain it will cure any and all ills!"
"You have no idea what you're doing, Walter. At best you're charging the people of Henford for something useless, and at worst, you're killing people!"
"Killing people? Nonsense! I'm a healer, like yourself!"
"You're a quack and a fraud!"
He's been bothering our family for many years. Even Samuel wanted nothing to do with him, though he didn't bother to have him exiled like the others. After all, his cures didn't work; he was no competition to Samuel.
"You know, your shunning of alternative medicine will come back to bite you in the backside someday-"
"Nothing you peddle could ever be anything to close to medicine, Walter!"
"Get off of my property!"
I slam the door, and hope to the Heavens that he doesn't come back this time.
It's going to be one of those days, I can just sense it. There hasn't been as much in the way of appointments lately, not with so many of Henford's people fleeing for Glimmerbrook.
His mention of a 'lady friend' only makes me long for Lydia even more. She's been travelling for a few days now by boat, joining me after the news from Violeta of my father's confirmed death. We sent letters as often as we were able to, and over the many years since I'd seen her, we'd planned to eventually marry and have children. The fact that it might be mere days until I see her fills me with a peculiar combination of excitement and nervousness. The only difference between Lydia being here rather than in San Myshuno is they'd more likely hang her here than burn her, and both of us had sworn to never do harm to anyone else...Would that change, if I were to have a wife and family? If I absolutely had to break my oath, was I even strong enough to defend my family if I had to?
On top of it all, a chilling guilt sits at the bottom of my stomach, and has done since Lydia sent a letter announcing her departure for Henford. Out of everyone in Henford, the only people's lives that had been bettered in the events of what happened was my own and Lord Volpe's, for different reasons. Everyone else's had been destroyed. Samuel's death meant that I was free to do whatever I wanted with this business and with my personal life. I was moving forward. My little brother isn't so lucky, with Oskar dead and the entirety of the woodworking business on his shoulders...
Eli and I were never alike growing up. I tried not to show emotions. I tried to bury them, as my father would; he used to tell me that feelings got in the way of success. Eli has always worn his heart on his sleeve ever since he was young. People thought him weak for it, but Eli is quite the opposite. I know he's strong. I just wish he knew the same.
There's a hectic banging at the door again. I just know that Walter has come back...
"Walter Viridis, if I ever see you on my property again, I am going to take your 'remedies' and I am going to shove them up your-"
I stop dead at the door, coloured with surprise and sheer mortification- it isn't Walter at all. It isn't until the embarassment wears off that I realise exactly who it is, and all of my nervousness melts into a warm glow in my chest. It's been years since I've seen here, and once again, I finally get to see that beautiful, smug face of hers.
"Is that a polite way to speak to your future wife?"
I'm completely dumbfounded. I don't know what to say to her. I have so much to tell her about, and now that she's right in front of me...I can't do anything except throw my arms around her.
All these years of longing to see her again, and she's here. At long last, I can start a life with the woman I love. I don't have to care about my father's approval, or him getting in the way. The smell of her perfume gives me a comforting sense of nostalgia.
"I'm so glad I get to see you again," she says, with her head on my chest. It's been so long since I've heard her voice...it all feels incredibly surreal.
"I've missed you terribly ever since I returned to Henford," I tell her, and it's taking all I have to refrain from shedding any tears.
"Ooh, so this is the real you talking, is it?" she teases. I realise she's never heard me talk like this. It took some time upon my return to Henford for the influence of the central San Myshunan accent to wear off. "I like it."
I can't hold back anymore, and I find myself in tears on her shoulder.
"I'm sorry," I tell her, sounding awful through my tearfulness. "I don't know why I'm..."
"It's been a long time," she replies, her voice hushed. "All those years of held-back emotions had to come out at some point, huh?"
She's right. I don't know how much of this is happiness and how much is just a purge of all I've been holding back for so long. It's been so long since I felt any gut emotions that I've forgotten which ones are which. I try to snap myself out of whatever this is.
"I'm so glad to have you here, Lydia. Truly."
"So am I." She runs her hand through my hair, and her cheeky expression slips into something more loving and compassionate. "You know, things have been boring in San Myshuno, and there are so many men there that are ten times worse even than Samuel."
"Things are a little slow here at present, but I have a few plans to change that," I say to her. "And with a surgeon at my side, it'll be much easier. There's also a local herbalist I think you'll get along with. Perhaps you could both share your knowledge with one another."
"Sounds good to me!" she chirps, shoving the mansion doors open and gazing up at the gaudiness of it all.
"Uh-huh. Samuel may have been a knowledgeable physician, but he definitely was not an interior designer."
"Not in the slightest. But now I can look at making this place a little cosier."
Having her in my arms like this...all of the waiting has paid off. I show her into the kitchen where I prepare us some supper.
"So, any plans for what's next, in terms of business?"
Straight to the point, as usual. Just one of the many things I cherish about her.
"It's going to be difficult considering my father scared off anyone within miles who had any sliver of interest of practicing medicine, but with him gone, I think we could hire new people, or possibly hire apprentices of some sort. I'm also considering hiring help around the place, once things get busier again."
"Sounds like a good idea, but do people even know about Samuel being dead?"
"They don't. Not yet, anyhow."
"I don't know how well this is going to go, Owen. I mean, when we get married, people are gonna wonder where your father is, and what he thinks about it all."
"He is- was- an aging man. I'm sure him being incapacitated for a while isn't too out of the question, Lydia."
Marriage. Of course- the engagement ring I bought her! Is it too early? We've been planning to marry for a long time, but...
"Okay, well, I just hope you're right about that. Anyway, I'm hungry after all the travelling- let's eat!"
* * *
After dinner, the two of us sit and chat mindlessly for a while. I excused myself for a moment, and grabbed the engagement ring from the bedroom. There's still something sitting strangely with me, however.
"I owe you an apology, Lydia," I say to her. "When we met, I was cocky, I was selfish, and I cared little for the poor and working folk. I was more like than my father than I'd like to admit, and for that...I'm deeply sorry. It didn't change until I'd saw that he'd beaten Eli when I'd come back here."
"I wasn't any different, Owen. It took me going to San Myshuno to break me out of that line of thinking. Out of all those men and women we were working alongside, I felt like we were the only ones who cared about medicine as well as money. Everyone else would have poisoned their patients if it meant making a buck out of it. And I remember you standing up to that Brindleton 'doctor' saying women had no place in medicine."
Lydia was correct, in a sense. Even at our worst, we still weren't as bad as some of the other people working alongside us. I met plenty of men who were three times as awful as my own father was.
"So you said there's a herbalist around?"
"There is," I reply. "Katlego Anansi. An amazing woman. My father had her framed and exiled for being 'competition', but she returned anyhow, got her own back on him, and now she's a cunningwoman and herbalist. I send some of the customers with more minor ailments her way. Her home was burned down, so I paid to have it rebuilt for her- as a sort of apology for what Samuel had done."
"You've come a long way, huh?" she replies, playfully. I know where she's going with this. "I remember when you wrote in the journals about herbalism being 'quackery' and 'a thing of the past', don't you?"
"Yes..."
Lydia and I met each other as rivals, when she'd written a paper about the science of herbal and ancient medicine to counteract my own arguments. The two of us engaged in a fierce public debate in the medical community, in which she'd beat me fairly. To say I was furious at the time would be an understatement, but I've learned a lot from her. She starts laughing to herself.
I'd started reluctantly working alongside her after that, and we'd become fairly close to each other. Not too long after, I became seriously unwell with some kind of illness that was spreading like fire through the city. It was actually Lydia's herbal remedies that had cured me in the end, and she didn't let me live it down. She's highly renowned for her work in controlling that illness, and the men were not happy to have been beaten by a woman.
"You can stop laughing anytime, Lydia."
"I can't!" she exclaims, still cackling away. "Dr. Owen Annorin, the almighty Gryphon, confined to bed, all pale and snotty and red-eyed and dying..."
"I definitely wasn't dying, Lydia."
"Until Lydia Xiàng saved your life with the magic of plants... and then it was all, 'Oh, Lydia, you are so beautiful...I love you so much...You mean the world to me...'"
It was true. It was whilst I was bedridden that I began to fall in love with her...I only wish I didn't embarassingly confess it whilst I was at my physical worst.
"Anyhow, enough joking around. I have something for you. Pretend to be excited about it, okay?"
She gives me a smug grin. She knows exactly what it is, but she plays along anyway and pretends like she doesn't know. She chuckles to herself, getting to her feet. This isn't a surprise to her, but I'm going to do it properly anyway. Lydia lets out an audible gasp, and brings her hands to her face.
"Oh my, Owen, this is beautiful! It's way beyond beautiful! It's perfect!"
"I'm glad you like it. I'm sorry I spoiled the surprise in our letters, but I must say, you're quite the actress."
"No, no, I'm not pretending to be surprised," she exclaims, her voice becoming tearful. "It's so perfect."
We've had this planned for a long time, and yet still I'm shivering with nerves. I know she's not going to say no. So why am I so nervous? Samuel is dead. I don't have to care about going behind his back anymore. I already did that when he was alive. I definitely don't need to feel guilty about it anymore.
"Lydia Xiang, how do you feel about becoming an Annorin?"
"Yes!" she cries, laughing through a tearful voice. "I can't believe it. All that writing about marriage, and now it's finally happening!"
I feel the same way. For all the years we'd been writing to each other, I longed to see her again.
I gently slip the ring into her finger, and it's a perfect fit, thankfully. She wiggles her finger around to see the glimmer of the diamond in the light.
To many in Henford, the gift of an engagement or wedding ring was a reminder to the wife that her husband owned her. For me, it serves as a reminder to Lydia that I will always be there for her, and of her importance to me.
"No worry. He's a little distracted, that's all. Good morning, Father."
"Dr. Annorin. Good to see you," he says, his voice monotone and shaky. He tries to inject a little emotion into his voice. "Oh, who is this?"
Before I can introduce her, she stands forward. "Miss Xiàng, surgeon, and Dr. Annorin's fiancée," she adds, showing off the engagement ring.
"Oh, wonderful! So when are you getting married, then?"
"That's what we were hoping to arrange with you, Father."
"That would be fun. How many people are you looking to invite, though?"
"I was hoping we could invite all of the locals as well as those closer to us," I say. "It would be enjoyable to have everyone enjoy the festivities. Perhaps we could get some input from the locals on how to run things from now on."
Whilst Lydia and I did genuinely love each other, our union was also partially motivated by business. We'd assisted each other plenty back in San Myshuno. I notice Reynold's expression screw up a little.
"Is there an issue?"
He makes an awkward noise in his throat.
"Well, I'd suggest something a little more private...The trouble is, Owen, most of the townspeople still hate you. Those who don't realise you've turned yourself around don't like you, those who noticed the reforms still don't trust you, and a lot of people say that the Annorin family should be thrown into the river. And that's not even the worst of those threats. Let's just say some of them can't be uttered under the church roof and leave it there."
"That's...unsurprising, but no less unsettling."
"I know he can be seriously annoying sometimes, but isn't drowning a little too drastic?"
"Lydia! - Anyhow, you make a good point, Father. What days do you have available?"
"Let's see..." -He pulls out a thick book and starts thumbing through it, muttering to himself. "Prayer, prayer, speech, prayer, charity work, feeding the poor, arguing with the High Shepherd, prayer...Oh! I do have a slot in about a month or so. There is just one problem."
I notice a sadness in his voice there.
"The only time I can slot you in is the day before a funeral- one you've been invited to."
My heart sinks in my chest, and Lydia gazes at me with a worried expression. I know exactly whose funeral it is.
Eli...I feel terribly for him. I already feel bad enough inviting him to this, a time of joy and happiness when all he feels is the entire opposite, and the day before his father's funeral nonetheless. I suppose if it is the only day available, then I will have to take it. I will be there at Oskar's funeral alongside Eli, so I'm there if he needs me. I'm concerned that he might become reclusive after all this. I don't want that to happen. I suppose Eli can take Daniel to the wedding with him; I've still yet to meet him.
"A funeral? Are you sure you'll be up to both?"
"Of course," I tell her.
"Whose funeral is it?"
"It's a little complicated, Lydia. I'll explain another time."
"We'll take it, Father. I'll come back to you once we've worked out some more details. What is a typical Peteran wedding like, anyhow? Any rules we ought to adhere to?"
"Most weddings in the monastery, typically speaking, are strictly kept very simple- but, if you're the one footing the bill, then you can have it be as lavish as you'd like," he adds, with a chuckle.
* * *
"Oh, wonderful. A letter from the Annorin family. I wonder how Samuel is-"
"One moment- a wedding invite? Samuel is remarrying? Wait- no!"
"Owen?!"
* * *
Lydia and I were having a lovely nap until the slamming of the door woke us both. We wondered if it were an angry patient, but we don't have any until the afternoon. Once my vision clears, I realise from the pathetic face and hideously-coloured outfit who it is. I see he got his invite.
"Who do you think you are?!"
"I could ask you the same question. Are you Lydia?"
"And why do you ask?" she sneers, giving him a smug grin.
Eduardo puts his hands together and tuts to himself. I think I know where this is going.
"Does your father know about this, Owen? It's all very sudden, don't you think?"
"Sudden? Of course it isn't. We've been discussing our eventual marriage for years."
"Years?" He almost jumps off the sofa. "You were planning to marry someone for that long and never even thought to ask for your father's approval? Does he know about this?"
"Does he need to know?" Lydia spits, sighing loudly to herself. "Owen is thirty-four years old. He doesn't need to ask his father's approval for anything."
"Except that the Annorin bloodline is one of high repute-"
"And Lydia herself is of equally high repute," I interrupt. "She's a respected surgeon and herbalist, and is almost single-handedly responsible for halting a pandemic back in San Myshuno. Don't soil your breeches, Eduardo," I say to him, trying to stifle laughter. "We both know what we're doing. Yes, this is partially a business move, but we also cherish one another. No, Samuel didn't know. Yes, he still doesn't. No, I've no intention of asking for his approval."
Volpe growls to himself, and out comes the Finger-Wag of Disapproval I remember it all too well from my childhood.
"To do something like this behind your father's back - all while he was recovering from Oskar's attack, and now, in his current state of illness? You should feel disgusted with yourself, Owen!"
Lydia turns to me when he mentions my father's illness. I did tell her that not everyone knows, but I didn't explain my albeit-flimsy cover story.
"That's a shame," Lydia coos, talking to him as if she were talking to a child. "Now why don't you run along and let the grown-ups do their work?"
* * *
Whilst Lydia is busy, I head out on the night to check up on Eli. I get in just as he's reading the invite I sent him, and judging by the look on his face, he's been reading it over and over all day.
I expect a different response when I get through the door to what he actually gives me. He lifts himself from the sofa with a furious vigour.
"The day before Oskar's funeral? Seriously?!"
It isn't like Eli to be like this at all...
"Eli, it was the only day that was available-"
"You could've postponed it! It can wait! But you chose to do it anyway, and now you're going to expect me to be smiling like an idiot at your wedding with nothing but my dead father on my mind!"
I'm completely taken aback. Does Eli really think I expect that of him?
"I understand that you're upset-"
"Of course I'm upset! On top of your poor timing, you've barely seen me at all since Oskar died!"
"You understand how important my work is, don't you? Some of the issues I deal with are potentially life-threatening, Eli. "
"You could've taken time just to send a quick letter instead, and you didn't. I've seen you once since it happened, and that's it."
With anyone else, I'd have lost my patience by now- but not with him. I know this is the grief speaking, not him.
"It's difficult to find time for everything right now, Eli. I apologise."
It isn't long until his anger melts into tearful guilt. Eli couldn't be angry with anyone even if he wanted to be.
"I'm sorry, Owen. I shouldn't have lashed out. I just...I don't know. I should be dealing with this better than I am. I'm a grown man, for Watcher's sake, but I can't stop thinking about it all..."
"You've no need to apologise. And you have every right to be grieving."
"I just feel like such a terrible person. I don't want to be miserable at your wedding, but I just can't force a smile right now."
"Eli, you don't have to force a smile for me, you know that," I reply, wiping away his tears with my sleeve. "I don't want you to pretend to be happy for me. I just want you there because you're my little brother, and I care about you."
It breaks my heart to see him like this. He finally found happiness in his life, and it's been taken from him, in part by his own 'father'. I have to bite my tongue. I can't tell Eli what happened to Samuel just yet, but I don't regret it- not even a little. After what he did to my brother, to Oskar, to Henford- he deserved nothing less.
"Besides, you can bring your partner with you. I've still yet to meet-"
"What? Are you joking?! What's Samuel going to do or say if he sees me with him?"
"Who said Samuel was invited?" I ask him, laughing a little. "He doesn't even know Lydia exists, and I intend to keep it that way. Maybe he'll find out eventually, maybe not. Either way, he won't be there- I can assure it."
Eli gives me a dark look with narrowed eyes, and my chest freezes.
"I promise. He won't be there, and he won't try to do anything. He won't even know it's happening."
All he does is nod, his eyes not leaving mine for a second. "I believe you."
"Sorry...for everything," he sobs. "I took the most special day in your life and made it about my feelings."
"You don't need to apologise for-"
He dissolves into loud, messy tears. He hasn't spoken much about his partner recently, come to think of it. Whoever this partner of Eli's is, I hope that he is good and honest to him. Eli's going to need his support with all that's going on.